April 26, 2016
Vulnerability has gotten a bad rap in pretty much all of the societies that exist in the modern world. It is equated with weakness and a lack of self-reliance.
You are not allowed to be seen as needing or needy, cannot allow others in to your pain, your loss, reveal the mistakes and “shames” that you hold
deep inside. It’s just not cool. The author of DARING GREATLY, Brené Brown, sees it otherwise. She has done extensive research into vulnerability and says,
“Vulnerability is not knowing victory or defeat, it’s understanding the necessity of both; it’s engaging. It’s being all in.” When you hold yourself
up as being indestructible, as impervious to your fears and follies and hold onto them, you risk both emotional and actual physical distress.
A couple of years ago I read Brené Brown’s first book, THE GIFTS OF IMPERFECTION and loved it so much gave out copies to friends and family. She not only speaks on the subject of vulnerability and shame with the voice of an expert, but also with the compassion and “imperfection” of one who is in the same soup with the rest of us. Her writing style is easy to read and filled with anecdotes from her own life and those of clients and interview subjects. The concept of opening up, of revealing yourself to others is not one that is easy, especially when you have been taught it is better to do otherwise, lest you incur ridicule and being socially shunned. I’m with Ms. Brown, that it is far better to take the risk, to open up and let go of those painful places in your life, than to play it safe and forsake the opportunity to be healed and whole. I highly recommend this book to everyone, as we all have pockets of shame that are stuffed with unhealthy thoughts and feelings. You can also listen to Ms. Brown speak on Ted Talks and YouTube.