in depth


Make Room for Love

Relationship Yoga III

Yoga is about making space. Some yoga postures create spaciousness in the spine; others make room for your organs, not to mention yoga practices to open up your heart chakra. You consciously use your breath to expand internally. Even the practice of going to yoga class is about giving yourself the freedom to focus on personal time.

Like your body, relationships require space—both physical and emotional—in order to stay healthy and balanced. Just as your yoga practice helps your body heal from injury, respond to stress and adapt to shifting circumstances, building flexibility and freedom of movement in your relationships allows you to respond more gracefully to the changes and challenges that you may face.

The beginning of a new year offers a natural time to evaluate how much spaciousness exists in your love relationship. It is a perfect time to create an intention to expand in those places that feel tight or constricted.

Start by looking inside. Are there areas where judgment, criticism, blame, guilt or regret creep into your relationship? Just bringing your awareness to them will reduce their influence and give you space to reflect. Are there things you need to lovingly and honestly communicate to your partner? Is it time to find ways to release old issues (which require precious life energy to maintain) and create room for some new ways of relating to each other?

Another way to create space in a relationship is to take a look at your routines. Are there activities you could let go of to open up more free time to be together? What about social obligations—do you habitually over-commit? You may find yourself connected to so many people and with multiple demands for your attention. Bringing more awareness to your time commitments—and graciously declining at times—will leave more space for spontaneity in your love relationship.

Experiment with ways to make space for some “quality” time with your love. Turn off your phones during dinner. Take a long walk together or a bike ride instead of seeing a movie. Instead of watching television, go outside with your love, cuddle up and watch the stars. Now that’s a feeling of spaciousness!

Mali Apple and Joe Dunn
Authors, The Soulmate Experience: A Practical Guide to Creating Extraordinary Relationships
The Soulmate Experience 

Recommended: Breathing Room: Creating Space to Be a Couple by Elayne Savage Ph.D


Anonymous commented on 05-Jan-2012 11:24 AM5 out of 5 stars

I love the walks & hiking. I always feel so much more peaceful and connected. Great ideas. Thank you.

Mali Apple & Joe Dunn commented on 19-Jan-2012 05:02 PM5 out of 5 stars

Thank you for the feedback. It seems with every new type of technological advance—think email, then Facebook, then texting—we need more awareness than ever to stay connected and grounded. Thankfully the stars will always be there to gaze upon!

Return to Article

Navigate Your Day with Grit & Grace

Get a Free Yogi Lifestyle e-Mint, Plus a Twice-Monthly Musing Delivered to Your Inbox