in depth


Embrace the Differences

Understand Your Partner's Perspective

According to the ancient yogis, the difference between men and women goes way beyond biology. While exceptions exist, men and women think differently - men think primarily in solutions, while women think in ideas.

When a woman wants to talk something out, the man in front of her is busy thinking of solutions to her perceived problem. While a woman is whimsically talking about repainting a room, her man is already planning where to buy the paint, recruit help and schedule the time. Women are inclusive in their thinking and can comfortably hold many possibilities in their psyches. Men choose one idea and act on it. She is able to keep an eye on dinner, check her e-mail, take a business call and pack for next week’s vacation – all at the same time. He can intently focus and shut out everything and everyone around them. This explains watching sports for hours on end.

These different ways of being have evolved from old wiring, once necessary for the survival of the species. A multi-tasking mind was necessary for the woman to keep her family safe. A one-track mind was a necessary for the hunter to patiently wait for his prey so that he could feed his family.

Today this is the cause of much of the conflict between the sexes. Understanding one another is the first step to cooperation. Men, know that the woman in your life is not expecting you to fix her problem; she just wants you to listen. Women, your man is not rejecting you when he wants to be alone; he’s just expressing his ‘hunter’ by becoming fully absorbed in the task at hand.

Here is a Venus Kriya made for “Getting Rid of Grudges” (from Relax & Rejoice: A Marriage Manual). It is a great meditation to do with your partner when you are in the middle of conflict, heated emotions or just can't seem to understand one another. It also works to prevent these difficulties. Sit back to back with your partner. Knees up, arms around your knees. Bring your focus to your heart. Visualize the Sun and bring it into your heart. Burn out all the conflict and bitterness you have felt throughout the years. Do this for 3 minutes. This easy kriya will help bring more clarity and compassion in communications with your partner.

Haribhajan Singh Khalsa
Catalyst Yogi
: Bringing the Cave to You

Hosting Monthly Global Men’s New Moon Meditation


Anonymous commented on 04-Jan-2010 07:06 AM5 out of 5 stars

I love your emails they are a wonderful way to start the day!

Andrea Beaudoin commented on 04-Jan-2010 08:09 AM5 out of 5 stars

I loved the practice suggestion at the end! I look forward to trying it!

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